“Children are educated by what the grown-up is and not by his talk.”
- July 26, 1875 – June 6, 1961
- Born in Switzerland
- Psychiatrist and psychologist
- Founded analytical psychology and proposed the concepts of archetypes and the collective unconscious
Quote
“Children are educated by what the grown-up is and not by his talk.”
Explanation
In this quote, Carl Jung emphasizes the profound impact that a parent’s or adult’s behavior has on the development of children, more so than their words. Jung suggests that children are keenly sensitive to the unspoken cues, actions, and attitudes of the adults around them, which shape their understanding of the world and their own identities. Rather than simply being influenced by what adults say, children internalize the values, beliefs, and emotional tones expressed through adult actions and interactions. This aligns with Jung’s broader ideas about the unconscious—how behaviors, particularly those that are not consciously intended, have a lasting impact on children. For example, a child might hear an adult talk about kindness, but if that adult’s actions reveal a different attitude, the child will learn more from the example set by the adult than from their words. Jung believed that this process of unconscious education plays a significant role in the formation of character, identity, and psychological health.
Historically, Jung’s quote reflects his interest in how early childhood experiences shape the development of the self. He often discussed the importance of the primary caregivers in shaping a child’s psychic structure, especially during formative years. The way adults model their behaviors—whether through emotional expression, relationships, or morality—becomes a template for how children understand and navigate the world. This idea is consistent with his broader theory of individuation, where the integration of unconscious influences, including those inherited or modeled from caregivers, is essential for psychological maturity. Jung also stressed that unconscious patterns established early in life have the power to shape a person’s adult behavior, often in ways that remain hidden until the individual begins to engage in self-reflection or therapy.
In modern terms, Jung’s insight is supported by contemporary child development research that emphasizes the importance of role modeling and emotional regulation in raising children. Today, parenting practices and educational approaches often focus on the emotional intelligence of adults and the ways in which this influences children’s development. Attachment theory, for example, shows that children are particularly attuned to the emotional state of their caregivers and that the ability of parents to model healthy emotional responses has long-term consequences for children’s empathy, resilience, and social behavior. Furthermore, Jung’s observation is relevant in the context of education, where teachers and mentors are encouraged to embody the values they teach, recognizing that children learn as much, if not more, from what they observe than from what they are explicitly taught.
