“Is there not, in the depths of love, an impossible longing to become exactly like the other?”

- January 14, 1925 – November 25, 1970
- Born in Japan
- Novelist, playwright, critic, political activist
Japanese
「愛の奥処には、寸分たがわず相手に似たいという不可能な熱望が流れていはしないだろうか?」
English
“Is there not, in the depths of love, an impossible longing to become exactly like the other?”
Explanation
In this quote, Mishima explores a fundamental paradox of love: the desire to merge with the other person, to become inseparable and identical in every way. He suggests that at the core of love lies an impossible yearning—the wish to become the other, to possess their identity and essence without any distinction. This desire is inherently unattainable, as it contradicts the very nature of individuality and human experience. Mishima points out that this longing to be one with another is a deeply emotional and almost irrational force, one that reflects both the intensity and the limitations of love.
Mishima often reflected on the tragic nature of love, where individuals are driven by desires that cannot be fully fulfilled. His works are filled with themes of alienation, self-sacrifice, and the inability to achieve perfect unity in relationships. This quote encapsulates the tension between the longing for unity in love and the reality of human separation. Even in the most intimate relationships, the separation of identity is inevitable, and this impossibility breeds a sense of frustration and unresolved desire. Mishima’s portrayal of love here is both romantic and tragic, reflecting his broader themes of yearning and disillusionment.
In modern relationships, this quote speaks to the idealization of romantic love and the expectation that perfect harmony or complete understanding can be achieved. Today, with the rise of social media and instant communication, there is often an unrealistic pressure to find a “soulmate” with whom one can perfectly align. Mishima’s insight reminds us that such a perfect union is unattainable, and that love, in its truest form, must embrace the inevitable differences between people while still holding space for deep connection and mutual respect.
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