“I think I lived those years very impersonally. It was almost as though I had erected someone outside myself who was the president’s wife. I was lost somewhere deep down inside myself. That is the way I felt and worked until I left the White House.”
- October 11, 1884 – November 7, 1962
- American
- First Lady of the United States, Diplomat, Human Rights Advocate, Chair of the UN Human Rights Commission
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Quote
“I think I lived those years very impersonally. It was almost as though I had erected someone outside myself who was the president’s wife. I was lost somewhere deep down inside myself. That is the way I felt and worked until I left the White House.”
Explanation
In this deeply personal reflection, Eleanor Roosevelt reveals the emotional cost of living a public role that overshadowed her private identity. She describes her time as First Lady as an experience of emotional detachment, as though she had created a separate persona to fulfill the expectations placed upon her. The image of being “lost somewhere deep down inside myself” conveys a poignant sense of inner displacement and the toll of constantly performing a duty-bound, external identity.
Roosevelt’s candor here reflects the conflict many public figures—especially women in traditional roles—face between personal authenticity and public obligation. As First Lady, she redefined the role by engaging actively in policy, civil rights, and journalism, yet this quote suggests that even as she worked tirelessly for others, she struggled with her own sense of self. Only after leaving the White House did she feel able to reconnect with her inner life and purpose on her own terms.
Today, her words resonate with anyone who has felt overwhelmed or hidden behind a role—whether professional, familial, or societal. Roosevelt reminds us that duty can sometimes come at the cost of identity, and that reclaiming one’s true self is an essential part of healing and growth. Her honesty offers both empathy and encouragement to those navigating the tension between who they are and who they are expected to be.
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