“The best revenge is to be unlike him who performed the injury.”
- April 26, 121 – March 17, 180
- Roman Empire
- Roman Emperor
- Influenced by Stoic philosophy, he wrote “Meditations” and practiced ideal governance as a philosophical leader, and was later praised as one of the Five Good Emperors.
Quote
“The best revenge is to be unlike him who performed the injury.”
Explanation
In this quote, Marcus Aurelius suggests that the most effective response to harm or wrongdoings is not to seek revenge or retribution, but to rise above the actions of the person who caused the injury. Instead of mirroring their negative behavior or engaging in petty retaliation, Aurelius advocates for maintaining integrity, virtue, and self-control. By doing so, we show that we are not defined by the actions of others, but by our own moral compass. This Stoic principle encourages us to focus on acting in alignment with our highest values, rather than being dragged down into the same negative behavior.
Aurelius, who faced personal attacks, political intrigue, and constant challenges during his rule, recognized that seeking revenge only perpetuates anger and conflict, while responding with virtue and reason elevates us above the petty actions of others. This mindset is still relevant today, where grudges and the desire for revenge can often fuel cycles of resentment and strife. Aurelius teaches that by choosing to respond with dignity and compassion, we not only preserve our own peace but also set a higher standard for how we engage with the world.
In practical terms, this quote encourages us to choose our response to others’ wrongdoings thoughtfully. For example, when wronged by a colleague, friend, or even a stranger, instead of reacting with anger or retaliation, we can choose to act with kindness and self-restraint, thereby demonstrating our strength of character. By being unlike the one who caused harm, we break the cycle of negativity and elevate ourselves above the injury, ultimately fostering a sense of peace and empowerment in our lives.
