“It is often necessary to know how to obey a woman in order sometimes to have the right to command her.”

- February 26, 1802 – May 22, 1885
- Born in France
- Author, poet, playwright
table of contents
Quote
“It is often necessary to know how to obey a woman in order sometimes to have the right to command her.”
Explanation
In this quote, Victor Hugo reflects on the complex dynamics of power and respect in relationships, particularly between men and women. He suggests that true leadership and authority are not based solely on commanding or being in a position of dominance. Instead, the ability to obey—to listen, understand, and show respect—is a crucial aspect of building mutual trust and balance in relationships. By showing deference or humility, one gains the respect necessary to lead or guide effectively. Hugo implies that authority is earned not by force, but through understanding and mutual respect.
This idea challenges traditional notions of power in relationships, where authority is often assumed to be one-sided. Instead, Hugo emphasizes the value of reciprocity and empathy in interactions. In this context, true leadership involves a flexible balance—sometimes allowing for obedience and humility to earn the right to be respected or to exercise authority at other times.
In modern terms, this quote speaks to the importance of respect and cooperation in any partnership, whether personal or professional. It suggests that effective leadership or influence comes not from a position of domination, but from understanding, listening, and sometimes even taking a step back to show humility. The quote encourages the idea that in healthy relationships, true power is shared, and that mutual respect is the foundation of effective communication and leadership.
Would you like to share your impressions or related stories about this quote in the comments section?