“In love, unreserved devotion is often linked to unreserved self-admiration.”

- January 14, 1925 – November 25, 1970
- Born in Japan
- Novelist, playwright, critic, political activist
Japanese
「恋愛では手放しの献身が手放しの己惚れと結びついている場合が決して少なくない。」
English
“In love, unreserved devotion is often linked to unreserved self-admiration.”
Explanation
In this quote, Mishima explores the complex dynamics of love, suggesting that unconditional devotion can sometimes be inseparably tied to self-love or self-admiration. While love is often seen as an act of selflessness, Mishima argues that devotion in romantic relationships can also stem from an egoistic need for validation and self-affirmation. This self-admiration might not always be obvious, as it manifests in the willingness to give oneself completely to another, but the underlying motivation could be the desire to feel significant or important through the act of devotion.
Mishima’s observation speaks to the complexity of human emotions and the blurry line between true love and ego-driven behavior. Often, in romantic relationships, there can be an underlying narcissistic element where the act of giving oneself to another is, paradoxically, also an act of self-enhancement. The lover’s devotion might not be purely for the other person, but also to reinforce their own sense of value and importance. Thus, love can become entangled with self-interest, and the pure act of giving can be influenced by a desire for admiration and affirmation.
In a modern context, this quote resonates with contemporary understandings of relationships, where self-identity and personal validation often play a significant role in romantic partnerships. While many people view love as selfless devotion, Mishima’s words suggest that romantic love can sometimes be a means of self-exploration and personal affirmation, revealing the complicated and sometimes contradictory nature of love in the modern world. It serves as a reminder to consider how self-love and personal fulfillment can sometimes intertwine with our deepest expressions of affection for others, complicating the emotional dynamics of romantic relationships.
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