“It is a childish nonsense to say that you cannot love because your self-consciousness is too strong; it is simply that by not loving, your self-consciousness becomes inflated.”

- January 14, 1925 – November 25, 1970
- Born in Japan
- Novelist, playwright, critic, political activist
Japanese
「自意識が強いから愛せないなんて子供じみた世迷い言で、愛さないから自意識がだぶついてくるだけのことです」
English
“It is a childish nonsense to say that you cannot love because your self-consciousness is too strong; it is simply that by not loving, your self-consciousness becomes inflated.”
Explanation
In this quote, Mishima critiques the idea that strong self-consciousness is an obstacle to love. He dismisses this notion as childish and nonsensical, suggesting that the true problem lies not in the self-awareness itself, but in the failure to love. According to Mishima, when a person refuses or is unable to love, their self-consciousness becomes exaggerated or inflated. The lack of love creates an inner void, which is then filled with an overemphasis on the self, leading to a distorted perception of one’s own importance. This quote implies that love is a way to transcend self-centeredness, and that only by giving love to others can a person truly overcome their own ego.
Mishima’s words reflect his broader belief in the danger of excessive self-consciousness and introspection. He often explored how being overly absorbed in one’s own identity or self-image leads to emptiness and isolation, while true fulfillment is found in relationships and connection with others. For Mishima, love is not just a personal feeling but a force that allows one to break free from the constraints of the self. The act of loving, then, becomes a way of engaging with the world in a more authentic, selfless manner, rather than remaining trapped within the confines of ego.
In a modern context, Mishima’s quote speaks to the growing issue of narcissism and self-obsession in today’s society, where individualism and self-expression are often prioritized over empathy and connection. In an era dominated by social media and constant self-promotion, people may become more focused on their image and perception by others, rather than on genuine relationships and selflessness. Mishima’s words serve as a reminder that the more we withdraw from meaningful connections and love, the more our self-consciousness can become exaggerated, leading to an inward spiral of loneliness and alienation. By engaging in authentic love, we can transcend our ego and experience a deeper, more fulfilling connection to others and to the world.
Would you like to share your impressions or related stories about this quote in the comments section?